How To Stop Pulling Back On Waves: The Real Reason You Keep Hesitating
One of the most common things I’ve seen while coaching surfers isn’t a lack of ability.
It’s hesitation.
A surfer catches wave after wave, paddles confidently into position and then suddenly pulls back when a slightly steeper set wave approaches.
They stop paddling.
Slide off the back.
Or simply let the wave go by.
The frustrating part is that most of the time they were capable of catching it.
They just stopped trusting themselves.
If you’ve ever paddled for a wave only to pull back at the last second, you’re not alone. Many beginner and intermediate surfers experience the same thing, especially when progressing into larger waves, steeper take-offs or unfamiliar conditions.
The good news is that pulling back is rarely a surfing ability problem.
More often, it’s a confidence problem.
Building confidence in larger surf often has less to do with technique and more to do with learning to trust yourself.
Many surfers assume confidence comes naturally with experience, but in reality it’s something you can actively develop. If confidence is something you’re struggling with, check out my guide on learning to surf later in life and building confidence in the ocean.
Why Surfers Pull Back On Waves
Most surfers assume they pull back because they aren’t good enough.
In reality, pulling back is usually a protective response.
Your brain sees something that feels uncertain or threatening and tries to keep you safe.
Sometimes that fear is obvious.
You might be worried about:
- Getting hurt
- Wiping out
- Hitting the bottom
- Other surfers in the lineup
- A previous bad experience
Other times it’s more subtle.
You might simply feel that the wave is slightly outside your comfort zone.
For many women learning to surf later in life, the fear isn’t necessarily the wave itself. It’s the consequences.
A bad injury might affect work, family responsibilities or the ability to care for children. Those concerns are completely understandable and often influence decision-making in the water.
The Problem With Pulling Back
Ironically, pulling back often creates the exact outcome surfers are trying to avoid.
A committed take-off gives you speed, momentum and control.
Pulling back halfway usually leaves you in the worst possible position.
You’re too committed to safely paddle over the wave but not committed enough to catch it.
I’ve seen countless surfers wipe out because they hesitated rather than because they fully committed.
Many of the surfers I coach are surprised to discover that the wave they feared most wasn’t actually that bad once they caught it.
The fear beforehand was often much bigger than the reality.
Why Women Often Pull Back For Different Reasons
This isn’t because women are less capable.
Far from it.
Many women simply approach risk differently.
Many women also become more hesitant in crowded lineups because they’re worried about making mistakes, getting in someone’s way or being judged by more experienced surfers.
If that sounds familiar, you might relate to Why Women Feel Intimidated in the Surf Lineup.
Over the years I’ve noticed that female surfers are often more aware of consequences.
They think about safety.
They think about other surfers.
They think about whether they’re in the right position.
They worry about making mistakes.
They worry about getting in someone’s way.
I can relate to this myself.
One of the biggest reasons I used to pull back wasn’t necessarily fear of the wave.
It was crowds.
I never wanted to be the surfer ruining someone else’s wave or breaking lineup etiquette.
There was a period where many women entering surfing were unfairly stereotyped as dropping in on everyone and not understanding priority. I became so focused on avoiding that stereotype that sometimes I’d second-guess perfectly good waves.
The result?
I missed opportunities that I was completely capable of surfing.
My One-Wave Rule
One of the simplest things that helped me stop pulling back was creating a rule.
At the start of a session, I had to commit to one wave as early as possible.
Not the perfect wave.
Not the biggest wave.
Just one wave.
Most of the time I would either make it or wipe out.
And honestly, that was the point.
Once I got the first wipeout out of the way, the fear usually disappeared.
I’d remind myself:
“I’m still here. I survived. Let’s get another one.”
Often the anticipation was far worse than the actual experience.
That first committed wave would usually change the energy of the entire surf.
How A Bad Wipeout Can Affect Confidence
Sometimes pulling back isn’t about today’s conditions at all.
It’s about a previous experience.
Years ago I had a bad wipeout in Indonesia that affected my confidence far more than I realised at the time.
Even when conditions were manageable, there was a part of me that remembered what had happened.
The body remembers.
The nervous system remembers.
And sometimes that memory shows up as hesitation.
Looking back, I realised the hesitation wasn’t really about the wave in front of me. It was about fear of experiencing that feeling again, which is one reason surfing bigger waves with confidence became such an important part of my own journey.
For me, learning breath control and eventually becoming a Surf Apnea instructor played a huge role in rebuilding confidence.
Understanding how to stay calm under pressure changed the way I viewed hold-downs and wipeouts.
If fear of wipeouts is contributing to your hesitation, I highly recommend learning more about Surf Apnea Training for Surfers.
Confidence isn’t just built through surfing. Sometimes it’s built by improving your ability to stay calm when things don’t go to plan.
Looking back, I wasn’t actually scared of every wave. I was scared of experiencing that feeling again. For years after a bad wipeout in Indonesia, there was a small part of me that remembered exactly how vulnerable I felt in that moment.
5 Ways To Stop Pulling Back On Waves
1. Surf Waves You Can Commit To
One of the biggest mistakes surfers make is progressing too quickly.
Many surfers go from feeling comfortable in waist-high waves straight into conditions that are well outside their comfort zone.
Confidence grows through successful experiences.
If you’re currently comfortable in smaller waves, spend time catching lots of them. Build consistency before increasing the challenge.
This doesn’t mean avoiding progression.
It means progressing gradually.
The surfers who develop confidence fastest are usually the ones who expand their comfort zone one step at a time rather than making huge jumps.
If you’re working towards larger surf, you might also enjoy reading How To Surf Bigger Waves With Confidence.
2. Expect To Wipe Out
Many surfers paddle for waves hoping everything goes perfectly.
The problem is that surfing doesn’t work like that.
Wipeouts are part of progression.
The moment you accept that falling is part of learning, much of the fear starts to disappear.
Some of the best surfers in the world wipe out regularly.
The difference is that they don’t view it as failure.
They view it as feedback.
Instead of asking:
“What if I fall?”
Try asking:
“What if I make it?”
3. Pay Attention To The Story In Your Head
Many surfers don’t realise how much their thoughts influence their decisions.
The moment a larger wave approaches, the mind starts creating stories.
- You’re not ready.
- You’ll blow the take-off.
- Everyone is watching.
- You’ll get smashed.
The problem is that your body responds to those thoughts as if they’re real.
Before long you’re hesitating, second-guessing and pulling back.
If this sounds familiar, check out Why Negative Thoughts Get Worse While Surfing.
Learning to recognise these thought patterns can have a huge impact on your confidence in the water.
4. Let Go Of The Need To Look Good
A surprising amount of hesitation comes from ego.
Not in the arrogant sense.
In the human sense.
We all want to look competent.
We all want to catch waves.
We all want to avoid embarrassment.
But surfing has a way of exposing every weakness.
The surfers who progress fastest are usually the ones willing to look silly, make mistakes and keep going anyway.
Sometimes pulling back has less to do with the wave and more to do with protecting our self-image.
If that resonates, you might enjoy reading Surfing and the Ego: Why Letting Go Is Key.
5. Build Confidence Outside The Surf
Confidence isn’t only built while surfing.
You can also develop confidence through preparation.
Improving paddle fitness.
Learning about ocean conditions.
Practising breath control.
Understanding hold-downs.
Developing a stronger relationship with discomfort.
Many surfers find that increasing their knowledge and preparation significantly reduces fear in the water.
Learning to read conditions can also help you avoid surfing waves that are simply outside your current ability level.
If you’re unsure whether conditions suit your experience level, check out How To Read A Surf Report.
When Pulling Back Is Actually The Right Decision
It’s important to remember that not every wave should be caught.
Good surfers know when to commit.
Great surfers also know when not to.
Pulling back can absolutely be the right decision when:
- Another surfer has priority.
- The wave is closing out.
- Conditions are well beyond your current ability.
- You’re fatigued and making poor decisions.
- A situation feels genuinely unsafe.
Confidence isn’t about taking every wave.
It’s about making good decisions consistently.
Sometimes the most confident decision is letting a wave go and waiting for a better opportunity.
Final Thoughts
Most surfers don’t pull back because they lack ability.
They pull back because they stop trusting themselves.
The solution isn’t becoming fearless.
The solution is building confidence through experience, preparation and gradual progression.
Start small.
Commit often.
Accept wipeouts.
Trust the process.
One wave at a time.
You might be surprised how quickly your confidence grows once you stop waiting to feel ready and start taking action instead.
Related Reading
- How to Surf Bigger Waves With Confidence
- Surf Apnea Training for Surfers
- Why Negative Thoughts Get Worse While Surfing
- Surfing and the Ego
- Why Women Feel Intimidated in the Surf Lineup
- Am I Too Old to Learn to Surf?
Frequently Asked Questions
Why do I keep pulling back on waves?
Most surfers pull back because of fear, hesitation or lack of confidence rather than a lack of surfing ability. Common reasons include fear of wipeouts, previous bad experiences, crowds or surfing conditions that feel outside your comfort zone.
Is pulling back on waves normal?
Yes. Almost every surfer experiences hesitation at some point. Pulling back is particularly common when progressing into larger surf, steeper take-offs or unfamiliar conditions.
How can I become more confident taking off on waves?
Confidence comes from repetition, gradual progression and building trust in your abilities. Surfing waves within your comfort zone, improving your ocean knowledge and learning techniques such as Surf Apnea can all help.
Does fear ever completely disappear?
Usually not. Even experienced surfers feel fear. The goal isn’t to eliminate fear but to learn how to make good decisions and take action despite it.
Why do I pull back more in crowds?
Many surfers become more hesitant in crowded lineups because they’re worried about making mistakes, getting in someone’s way or being judged by others. This is particularly common among adult learners and women surfers.